Race Report! The Maritime Race Weekend Half Marathon

Saturday morning I was up before my alarm went off. I was ready to gett'r done at the Maritime Race Weekend. I had trained, not as much as I had wanted to or planned to, but I felt ready enough to run the half marathon with my brother Josh. We got ready but in our nervousness/rush we both forgot to eat anything before we lined up at the start. Ugh. I had run for 2.5 hours on nothing before but I knew this race would last slightly longer than that given that I was wearing an extra 3lbs. of brace on one leg. We lined up as we both realized this little fact, but by then t was too late to really do anything about it. And then we were off, running through a narrow chute of people dressed as pirates (the race theme) to Shore road, which winds along the coast for 2.5kms. We ran the whole 2.5kms without issue, although I started faster than I expected. The we turned onto the Caldwell road hill, a steep 20 degree incline that humbles most people to a walk. We trudged up that to the Ocean view manor loop where we began running again, hit our first water station, then continued on to Cow Bay Road. The volunteers were full of energy and smiles as they cheered and directed us along the way. We hit a good pace going down to Cow Bay, passing a few people and enjoying the reduction in runner traffic. Then we started up Dyke Road where we were actually stopped by a very frazzled RCMP officer who asked if we were the last people. We knew there were a lot of people behind us so we told her no as we stated walking (we're in a race here!), there were plenty more coming. She seemed very shocked by this and asked us the same question two more times before a volunteer came over and tried to explain the situation to her. It seemed like she was told to go control some traffic without being let in on the race part of the job lol. We continued on our way up a long slow hill until we finally reached the turn at 10km. There we found the "temptation station" which had skittles, resiens and cold coffee. I grabbed some skittles since I desperately needed a sugar boost at that point. A few hundred feet down the road we hit the steepest hill, one where you seriously question the thinking behind the road designers to put a road at such a steep incline. Yeah, that steep. We power walked it and then jogged the downhill. We plodded on, the easy pace a few kilometers back now becoming more of a struggle. Still though, our time and pace was better than I expected and I secretly hoped we would make the finish in 3 hours. My knee had other plans. We rounded a corner, heading back to the finish line when saw the 15km sign. My knee saw it too and decided right there and then to give me a shot of stabbing pain straight through the center of my knee. I stopped to walk. After a minute it passed and we continued on, although by then my quad muscles were now cranky and cramping up periodically. My brother was super kind and wasn't bothered (at least not verbally or visibly) by us stopping to walk every few minutes after that point. By the time we got to the 18km mark it felt like tiny nails were suddenly banging around inside my knee and we were both starving. We talked about food, I joked that I could stop in at the corner store and get a bag of chips, but we continued on. I was going to finish this thing, and I was going to finish it running even if I had to drag my leg to the finish (something that was becoming a possibility at this point). We walked for a few seconds just before the final turn then started to run. We passed two walkers and just kept going. It was 100% mental for me at this point. My leg was throbbing, my knee stabbing, the opposite thigh was stinging from some serious Velcro chafing, and I was fighting every step to put it out of my mind and focus on the finish. The cheers from the crowd at the finish helped lift me up as we made our way closer and closer to the finish chute. Once we were in the chute I knew it was mere seconds before we finished so I kept my resolve and continued on running. My brother was cheering as we neared the line. All I could say was "Thank God." as we crossed my brother giving me a sideways hug as the photographer snapped pictures. I did it. Its been years since a 21km felt that hard or took that long to finish (3:17 is our official time) but it was one of my most rewarding races. Not because I hit a new PB or distance, but because I finished it giving it all I had and I had family there to support me every step of the way.

10 Humid Kilometers

I'm going to say that this year Mother Nature decided to cram all possible summer weather-types into one month. Seriously. Last week's race had scorching temperatures and a blazing sun. This week my 10k consisted of an overcast sky but 100% humidity making the 10k feel longer than it probably should have...but at least I had my daughter's pool to jump into afterwards! The 10k run itself went better than I expected. My legs felt okay, I will fess up and admit I had to take a few pain-related walk breaks, but overall I squeezed out a few really solid kilometers, even with Mr. Peanut in tow. So last Thursday was one of my last torture visits to the Chiropractor, Dr. Helson. He's off competing at an Ironman (I'm so not worthy), and honestly there's only so much deep tissue message can do. Some of the healing has to happen in the knee. He noted I've got a loser-then-normal MCL, which is why my inner knee has been paining me a lot lately (that combined with the torn cartilage). He worked on it but honestly it was like someone lit a match and threw it in my knee, it burned so bad. I was the closest I've been to tears at that session. Even the laser-which just sits on the surface-caused me to give a few yips of pain. So, of course, being a child of the Internet era, I Dr. Googled it. And there's not a hell of a lot that can be done that I'm not already doing (which is actually shocking, I half expected Dementia to be among the symptoms lol). I just wonder if I'll be in this much pain forever??? And finally, I've got that half marathon coming up in, oh, 2 weeks! Yikes! I know I'll finish it, and I think since I don't have a time goal I've been not too stressed about making the distance. I know I can do it (well I know the OLD me could do it), so I figure at the worst I'll just grin and bear any pain. Thankfully the pain only creeps in badly after a run.

Race Review! The Navy 10k

Well, the first race that gave me a good case of heat stroke didn't disappoint with the steamy 27 degrees Celsius temps yesterday! Lol. Thankfully this time I learned my lesson and hydrated often, spilled water over my head at every water station and ran in the shade of trees when possible. Overall it was a fun, exciting race and I was SO happy to have my husband right beside me the whole way. The morning started off great. We arrived in plenty of time, milled around saying hello to fellow runners and grabbing a quick banana and nervous bladder-porta-potty run before the race start. Richard and I decided to head to the back of the group since I had no plans at an all-time 10k PB and was simply hoping to finish without needing a pair of crutches. The route was the reverse of what it had been for 29 years, so this apparently caused some confusion for the leaders (as I learned afterwards), but for the mid to back of the packers I think it was nice to switch it up and see which way was more difficult. Personally I think the reverse way was much more difficult, but that's debatable. We started off in front of the Stadacona military base, running a few hundred meters before heading up a short but hilly street then turning right onto a well shaded side street before turning again, then again onto Agricola street, where we would run for the next 2k. Agricola took us up a long climb then flattened out and dipped downwards again. Then it was more side-street zig-zagging before heading straight down Gottingen street to the end of the first lap. By the end of the first 5k Richard was feeling pretty good and was keeping a strong pace. I wanted to die I was so hot and every limb felt heavy. But the cheer of the crowds as we passed by, including a very cheerful motorcycle gang, gave me the pep I needed to keep going. I focused on my pace and back up the side-streets we went. By the 6k mark Richard was having a hard time with his legs and a blister that was forming on one of his big toes. He pushed through it though. As for me, my knee would sting whenever we went downhill, but otherwise everything held up very well, which I give credit to my Chiropractor for! As Richard and I came up to the 7k mark we started looking behind us and suddenly there was no one. Now, I knew we had passed other 10k runners and walkers earlier and that we had held it together well enough that I didn't see them all pass us, so we started to wonder..did everyone else drop out? Were we the last ones on the course?! It was HOT but it wasn't as hot as it had been in previous years....Then a police officer drove up beside us on his motorcycle. "Hey guys, he said, have you seen anyone else on the course?" he asked, kind of embarrassed. "No, we both said, are we the end, the last ones?" "Well, there was this other lady but I can't find her now so yeah you are probably it. Thanks!" he said as he drove off. "Frig." we both said. Then I spotted a couple walking ahead of us, who were just far enough ahead they were probably out of earshot for our exchange with the officer. "I don't want to finish last." Richard said. I agreed, neither of us wanted that, so we started running again, keeping the pace we'd had the whole race but which felt a lot harder now. We passed the couple then eyed four more runners ahead. We kept going, and going for another 2k before the heat and a hill got Richard and we had to walk. It wasn't too long before I saw the couple we had passed though, now running! I started running again, agreeing to walk again when we got to the next water station. It was there that Richard saw the other couple and it was enough to give him a push to run it out to the finish. We came within 30 seconds of the person ahead of us, but simply not finishing last was good enough for us. As we stood cheering the couple behind us into the finish line the announcers said the couple was, in fact, the last people on the course. Whew! We had done it. We finished the 10k in one piece, felt satisfied with the time and managed to not come in dead last. Mission accomplished.

First Race of 2015!

Well I certainly would never have bet back in January that my first race of 2015 would be the Johnny Miles 5k family race in Sydney Mines NS. Nope. I was supposed that have been in PEI, running the Brookvale Ultra trail race this past weekend, but I knew a few months ago the quad and hamstring crushing course would not be possible for me this year. So after a race-less spring when my husband casually mentioned the local 5k race that would be happening the morning after we arrived in Sydney Mines to visit his family I jumped at the chance. I knew this low-key event would not be punishing to my legs and hoped that I could convince my daughter to join me. Thankfully she wanted to do it once she heard her parents were running it! The race was on the hottest day we've had so far this year. To boot, it's held at 10am, when the sun is bright and hot. The three of us casually walked up to the start line (usually one of us is a bucket of nerves!). Then with a "go!" we were off. I should actually say my husband and daughter were off. I kept up with them for, oh, say 100 meters when they left me in the dust. I plodded along, determined not to walk until I reached the bottom of the big hill (1.5km away). The sun was already scorching and I tried to focus not on the other runner's chatter but on my own breathing and trying to relax into the run. I repeated to myself "run your own race, run your own race" until I could feel my legs getting into their normal everyday run groove. Happy with that I looked downhill at my daughter and husband, now at least 500 meters ahead and running strong. Finally I got to the bottom of Fraser Avenue and turned left to start power walking the steep incline. With the heat and my leg in its neoprene brace (HOT!!) I knew trying to shuffle up the hill would waste precious energy. So I power walked that hill until I hit the apex, the started to run again. I saw my mother in law had walked down her street to meet us, but she missed my daughter and husband and had to settle for cheering for me. I caught sight of my husband and daughter shortly after the 3km mark, my daughter now reduced to walking. To her credit, she hadn't run a race in over a year and hasn't been running at all this year. She tried to stay ahead of me, but in the next kilometer she just couldn't get her legs back under her and had to walk most of the remaining 1km distance. I had caught up to her by then so we walked/ran it together as we watched my husband pull away and continue on, running much stronger than I honestly expected. I finished in 45 minutes, pretty much where I thought I would be. My husband finished closer to 38 minutes, which was a good solid time, for not having trained anything close to 5k this year and carrying around a few extra pounds. My daughter, for being the youngest runner in the event, got a special plaque and her picture taken with the winners. All in all it was a great first race. My next race will be in only 2 weeks, where I'll be doubling down and running the Navy 10k with my husband, who now thinks he'll do just fine without training lol.

The original "Johnny Miles"

Black and Blue...but is it working?!

So my Chiropractor is doing myofascial release, along with message and a wee bit of laser on my knee. It is incredibly painful (the myofascial part) and has left my leg literally black and blue with bruises. Owie. Initially, my leg felt "freed up" and I went for a glorious 7km pain-free run. Then I had another session and the results were less than awesome. Albeit, it is incredibly humid around the city at the moment, so I can't blame my crappy run on just one thing, still. My leg felt like I had DOMS and my ankle decided that it would swell up-yay :-/ Even with that though I squeaked out another 5k run. This Navy 10k is happening, so I'd better be ready (that's what got me out the door yesterday anyhow lol). Dr. Google has mixed feelings about this black and blue thing. I am pretty sure I bruise fairly easily, which I blame on fair skin, but is it normal?! Some forums say yes, it is pretty common, although I don't know if they mean a tiny little bruise or the ones I'm currently sporting that run down my leg from the thigh to the calf? Others say heck no, they're doing it wrong if you bruise, you should go lighter. To that I wonder, is that just a reflection of general society's view now that any therapy should be as pain-free as possible? I disagree and know that sometimes a bit of pain, or yucky tasting medicine, is the best way to go, even if it makes you scream at hilarious octaves. Either way, even with the bruising, my knee feels more mobile and less painful overall (no more stabbing pain all day, every day!) so I'll keep up the Chiropractor routine for a bit longer, I just hope I don't need to wear a swim suit any time soon lol.

Shoe Review! Saucony Hurricane 16s

First off I have to say this shoe is the cushiest shoe I've ever had. Period. I've run on sidewalk, road and trail with it and it gives the same consistent ride through all types of terrain. Large trail rocks are no match for them-no footpad bruises! It has a much larger heel to toe offset than I would have normally chosen (8mm) but I wanted a shoe with lots of forefoot cushion since my gait pattern has changed since I started running again and I'm rolling much more to the right on my right foot and literally running on the side of my left foot, gawd, I must look like a hobbling duck. Anyway, back to the shoe. Here are my Pros and Cons: Pros: Cushion: Cushy factor is at a 10. If you've been nervous about taking the maximalist shoe leap and buying a pair of Hokas, this shoe might be nice middle ground for you. I grow about 6 inches with them on, they have a big platform to store all that cushion, but I don't find it bothers me. Ventilation: Even though it looks like a lot of shoe, Saucony covered the top of the shoe with a durable mesh that lets your foot breathe, even in 30 degree (Celsius) weather. Traction: Although not an actual trail shoe, this shoe has decent enough treads that you won't be nervous to run down a dirt trail or cross a stream in them. Responsiveness: Now I'm not bombing down trails and making super fast changes in direction with my messed up knee, but I like to think my usual street to trail route changes enough that I can say that this shoe doesn't try to "control" your foot at all, it goes where you want it to even though its actually billed as a stability shoe. Cons: Weight: The weight is a bit heavier than what I'm used to, coming in at 9.5 ounces, when most other shoes I've run in lately are less than 5 ounces, but really, it didn't take long to adjust to that small difference in weight. Heel Lock feature: Umm, what? My husband has the men's version of this shoe and he loves how it "locks" his ankle in place. Mine, not so much. I have to really tie down my foot tightly to get my ankle to stay put, but it hasn't given me a blister or anything yet, I'm just not buying this "lock" feature they speak of. Toe upper: What the heck is this huge cushiony thing? It seems a bit over-stuffed and I was concerned that the toe upper would irritate me as I ran by slapping against the front of my ankle, but it's been fine actually. I was also worried it would act like a sponge and collect water or sweat (yuck!) as I ran, but it hasn't done that either. All that cushion in that part of the shoe seems a wee bit like overkill in my opinion. So, all in all, this is a decent shoe. It is not my all-time favorite, but right now, as I come back from injury/with injury, it is a comfortable shoe that responds well during a run on any terrain. I give it a 4 out of 5 stars overall.

New Therapy-what the heck

I went to my GP yesterday about my new stabbing pain in my knee. Again, for the millionth time, I love my GP. She is so kind and she's also a runner so she knows my focus is to regain the quality of life I had before I messed up my knee. She checked out my knee and agreed that most of the HA fluid has probably gone straight into the lower left patella bursa, so it really hasn't been helping with my knee issue at all, although the double kneecap look sure is interesting lol. She asked how much I was running and was actually shocked that I'm running through this pain, I told her my surgeon told me to haha. In all honesty though, I would still try to run even if he hadn't told me to continue ;-) So, in the end she disagrees with my surgeon that for the next 5 months or so I should just deal with the pain, so she's sending me to a Chiropractor. I'm up for anything at this stage. It sounds a bit odd, but really, the issue is with bones and cartilage so I guess this makes sense. Whatever. This guy comes highly recommended and he's a triathlete himself, so at least I'll find a kindred spirit. Now hopefully I won't have to wait a month to see him :-/ As for my running plan, I'm continuing on, as best I can with my Breg shortrunner brace, and hope that the stabbing pain doesn't mess up every single run.

Shaking Things Up to Keep Moving

What I had secretly hoped was a bit of overdoing-it-related pain has made itself known its an issue and I'd better deal with it. That stabbing pain hasn't gone away, and in fact its crept into general walking as well. Something is wrong with the medial side of my knee. I don't know if its just the OA or if something has worn down or if the meniscus is more damaged than it was when I got the MRI in February. I just don't know. What I do know is that this hurts damn it. So, taking the bull by the horns so to speak I decided to postpone my long run this weekend and do some cross training instead. I can certainly say my arms and butt needed it! Oww! I did a great chest, shoulders and arms workout Saturday and followed it up with an hour of legs and back on Sunday. Since both workouts required minimal knee involvement I felt great. I think this might be the magic pill for me; if I can get in one of those workouts each day (or most days) then I won't feel as horrible if I have to do more walking than running when I'm hitting the streets and trails AND I'll be following my surgeon's advice by continuing to work out. Now, big ideas aside, I really do need to do something about this silly pain. I know if I want to keep building my mileage (and heck-finish that half marathon in September!) I will need to find a way to run without feeling like I've got a gremlin stabbing at my knee with each step. I looked at unloader braces, but they seems pretty extreme. Do I really need something like that? Tightening and adjusting the hinges in my short runner brace isn't helping much anymore. If I was talking with someone else about this I would tell them to see their physiotherapist, but my surgeon didn't think I needed to see one. Ugh. A wee bit frustrating but then again none of this issue has been really easy (aside from the MRI appointment - Love you Mom!). Okay, so I've got 8 weeks to get trained for a half marathon and find a way to cope with this new pain. Sometimes when I'm running I wonder if one day my knee will just decide its had enough and totally give out on me and that will be it for running, but then there are other days when I hear from people who've overcome injures similar in severity to mine saying "Find a way around the injury, don't let it be a crutch!" And my perseverance side kicks in and I know I will continue to push on any way I can.

A new Mantra

Ow, ow, ow. That's been my mantra for the past couple of runs and recovery days. Ugh. I'm at a loss. I haven't done anything unusual to my knee but its angry nonetheless. Every footfall feels either like bone is hitting bone (like a pencil being poked REALLY hard into the side of your knee if you want a comparison), or it has felt like someone stuck steel wool in there. It's only on one side so I'm starting to wonder if that so-called "minor" tear in my meniscus has somehow gotten bigger? Or maybe my knee just isn't happy for some other reason. Either way, running, with or without a brace at the moment, sucks. My angry knee is twice the size of my good knee, even with daily icing and rest days. Okay, so with that whining done, what do I do about this? The way I see it I have three options, each with their own issues. 1. Go see another doctor. The Pros to this is that maybe they'll tell me what is going on and be able to help take away this pain. The Cons is what I've been dealing with since I injured myself. Doctors that if they don't see an issue on an X-ray, there's nothing wrong, right? Well I have a healed cracked knee, slightly torn meniscus and 50% of my cartilage that says xrays don't show the full picture all of the time. Never mind waiting in that ER eats up half of a day. 2. See my doctor for a physio referral. Pros, I know my doctor will give me one and maybe the physiotherapist will figure out what's going on. I could get a different brace, one that is called an un-loader so it takes the pressure of that angry side of my knee..or Cons, they could be as incompetent as my last physiotherapist and do more harm than good. 3. Do nothing, keep running with the brace, grit through the pain, ice constantly, and hope someday I don't totally collapse on the sidewalk. Pros...well that saves me tons of time in doctor visits. Cons, well that description pretty well sums it up. So what do I do?

How did I forget that?!

Yesterday I managed to forget to bring my brace. Yeah, really. Somehow I totally forgot the 5lbs of neoprene and plastic hinges sitting on my kitchen counter as I packed the rest of my gear. I had a remarkably short debate with myself at the end of the day when I was getting ready for my run-commute. Do I skip it since I have no idea how my knee will feel afterwards if I run without it (but probably not great), or say screw it and go for it. I went for it. In the interest of total honesty though it did take me 5 minutes to work up the courage to transition from a walk to a jog. The run itself went pretty darn good. The Saucony Hurricane 16's are incredibly cushy but comfortable. My feet were very happy. My knee...not so much. I kept dialing back my pace and taking short little steps to keep the impact to a minimum, but even then it felt like someone was stabbing a pencil into the side of my knee with each footfall. Guess I need that brace after all. After my daughter and I got home we quickly threw our stuff aside and jumped (I stepped ;-)) into the small pool we bought the other day. My knee was instantly happier after getting submerged in the cold water. I sat there for a good 5 minutes watching my daughter dance around with the pool noodles. Now this is the kind of recovery I can get used to! So, so far so good. I managed my 5k of training yesterday. Today I've got either a 5k or some speed work (Ha!) of 7x400. I think I may switch up the so-called "speed work" with hill training of 7x30 seconds though since I'm likely to get a better workout that way with the brace on. I'm feeling cautiously optimistic about my chances of completing the Navy 10k and then the Half Marathon. I am also longing for one of Jodi and Karine's trail races, but when their 5k trail race equals the toughest 10k you've ever imagined, I know I'm not ready for that kind of running...just yet. My heart is already back out there though, now I just need my legs to catch up!

I'm In! (Gulp)

I pulled the trigger. I took the leap. Yup, I signed up for a half marathon in September! I don't think I've been this nervous since my first ultra! Okay, so the details. I'm running the Sunrise Half Marathon at the Maritime Race Weekend on September 12th. I've run the full marathon on this course so I know the half marathon route, which follows the first 40% of the full marathon route. It's a scenic, hilly but fun half marathon. It also comes with swag and a cool medal, which is half the reason I picked it. My opinion is that if I'm going to do this I want something to show for it in the end and while the MEC half marathon in October is a bit easier and cheaper it doesn't give me anything other than a non descript bib to show for my training and effort on race day. I want the medal, damn it! It also helps that this race course goes right past my house, so travel won't be an issue ;-) I've got four weeks to my first 10k race with my brace. So far the training has been going pretty well. I haven't had any major setbacks and I've managed to be consistent with at least 4 runs a week. So far so good. I decided to follow the Runner's World Half marathon training plan because I think I need some guidance and the fact it also follows a run 4 times a week schedule. This weekend it has me doing a 12k run. I haven't gone that far yet this year (at one go), so I'm excited/nervous at the prospect. The bonus though is that I finally got NEW SHOES! Yes, my husband and I both got a pair of Saucony Hurricane 16s this past Saturday. I actually haven't run in them yet per se, but I plan on it this afternoon as I do my first Half Marathon training run of 5k. So, stay tuned for a shoe review coming soon!

Being thankful and daring to dream

Yesterday's run was a good run. It was hot as all heck but I managed a solid pace for 3 miles. I was extra pleased later last night when my leg wasn't throbbing like crazy either. It just goes to show some days will be good. I wanted to post on Facebook but it just seems so silly to post "Had a great 3 mile run!", yet I could use the support too. I am so thankful for my mother who made sure I got treatment right away and I didn't have to be a victim of Canada's public health wait list for a year. I'm thankful for my wonderful husband who supports me by taking care of our daughter so I can run and caring enough to ask how I'm feeling. I'm also grateful for my online support which, honestly, has really helped me as they also know what it's like to live with OA day to day and all the ups and downs that brings. I'm also SO incredibly thankful for still being able to get out there and run most days, even if it is with a leg brace now. On my run yesterday I made sure to go through one of the only parks between my work and my daughter's day camp. As I ran along the tiny little patch of dirt trail I imagined being in one of Jodi and Karine's races, with the forest around me and 45kms ahead. Ah, a girl can dream, right?

Another Pep Talk and new Plan of Action

Yesterday I had a check up with my orthopedic surgeon. I pretty well knew what would be said before I got in there. So it was no surprise I had my fifth pep talk about this injury taking time to heal, as much as it will, and if I don't find any significant relief in the next few months I can ask for another HA injection. The first injection seemed to improve how long I could go through the day without pain meds so maybe in a few months another one will help get me back into better running form. We'll see. Between now and November though I'll be doing all I can to get my leg back to the new normal as best I can. My plan of attack: 1. Keep running, consistently at least 4 times a week. 2. Run that 10k in August and half marathon race in the fall. I would personally like I run a half marathon a bit earlier than what I have planned but we'll see if there are any cheaply priced ones around. 3. Lose these damned injury pounds. I've been thinking about going vegetarian, I pretty much follow that way of eating now, except for, well, bacon. 4. Look for a non-neoprene leg brace. I didn't know neoprene would give me a rash if I wear it too long, but now I know. It's probably been adding to my hatred of the thing so the less I resent the brace the better. 5. Get a new pair of running shoes! A new pair of running shoes is a great motivator for any runner but besides that I seriously need a new pair. So that's it. My in-laws are visiting tonight but I'm still going to get my short run-commute in before making supper for them. I'll try not to drip into the pots and pans lol.

Slog On!

Well, even after yesterday's whine fest I managed to get out for a run. The heat was insane as I left work so I was happy to jump on the indoor track (that circles an ice rink!) once I picked up my daughter from day camp. In total I managed 5km walking and running, but more walking really. Regardless, I was soaked and from what I hear today will be more of the same. I've been trying to space out my runs so I have a day of rest between them but with this week's schedule; my surgeon appointment tomorrow afternoon, then my in-laws (maybe) visiting Thursday overnight, I want to make sure a possible two days rest doesn't evolve into three or four days. But back to yesterday's run. I started off slow, because hey, I've got a leg brace on so I figure no one will be too judgey if I'm moving at a snail's pace, trying hard to focus on my landings so I push off from a neutral position rather than over pronate, which I've somehow developed lately (I need to see a physiotherapist again!). I thought about a YouTube video I was watching/listening to earlier which discussed how to "reverse" arthritis. The host had some interesting opinions about extinction events and vaccines, but his reasoning around food, exercise and pain certainly gave me a few light bulb moments. His case was that it is processed food which is causing our bodies to develop chronic conditions, such as repetitive overuse injuries, MS and arthritis, and by going vegetarian and exercising at least 30 minutes a day we would alleviate much of the issues we experience. I'm not sure its the miracle cure he says but it certainly is simple (and cost efficient) enough to try. So, 30 minutes a day shouldn't be too hard. I already do that in a typical day. It's the no meat and no processed foods bit that will be more difficult. It did have me thinking about my recent trip to France though. Honestly, I saw one overweight person while I was there and you wouldn't consider her obese. Their culture is not obsessed with food or diets, although they love their food. They eat three-four meals a day. Their meals are big enough (and delicious) to satisfy you until the next meal so snacking just isn't a thing there. Really. I didn't see corner stores selling candy, chips or sticks of pepperoni and cheese, nope. You eat a real meal and move on. No one was fretting about this sauce or those calories at all. Top that off with endless amounts of daily walking and you've got a society filled with average-sized, healthy adults. I think we in North America could learn a thing or two about that approach, but then the multi-billion dollar diet industry would be out of business. But I digress... Once I got to the day camp we went up to the refreshing ice rink track and did laps for 30 minutes. My daughter raced around me, lapping me as she stopped for breaks in between (the little speed monster!). It was nice to get back on the track though. I used to spend a lot of time there and I know how helpful those sessions were to my training over the years. For a moment I had the glint of feeling like my old runner-self, just with an extra 30lbs of "injury" pounds added. One day, one run, at a time right? Right.

I can do this...right?

This past week of running has been a slog-fest. I've forced myself to get through each run interval and walked far more than I should. I've been achieving my goals in distance but it's literally been taking me twice as long as it used to to accomplish it. It is very frustrating. To boot, I need new shoes as the ones I bought just before the accident have finally worn out, or rather my "good" leg's shoe has worn out from the new weight imbalance. I don't even know what shoe would work for me nowadays. Do I continue to buy minimal shoes, knowing I need far more forefoot padding than I used to? Do I stick with what I know? Does it matter since I'm slower than a turtle in peanut butter? I'm not just frustrated with my shoe choice though, it's my lack of groove. I just want to be back to normal. I want to just throw on a pair of shoes and go, to feel that steady beat of my feet, wind in my hair and sweat on my forehead. Lately though it's felt more like some kind of weird horse gallop, no wind (I'm not going fast enough) and yes, there is sweat, a lot of it, everywhere except on my forehead. Ugh. I'm doubting myself. My ability to "get through this", my ability to bounce back in any shape or form. It doesn't help that my husband, who used to be my biggest supporter, now me tells me to take more time off. I am taking it easy though. Honestly. I run up to 4 times a week (down from 6-7) and I still haven't cracked that 8km mark, although I've only made it to 8km once in the past 6 months. So it's not like I'm overdoing it. I see my surgeon this week. This appointment is an update since I had the HA injection 3 months ago. I'll tell him that I think it had some positive affect. I don't hurt all day long any longer, now the more severe pain waits until the end of the day. I'll also tell him that I need a new physiotherapist as my last one was a total bust (treating the wrong side of the knee). I still ice every. single. day. I still take pain killers every. single. day. My leg still swells, sometimes with the changes in weather, sometimes for no apparent reason at all. And I still wake up most nights with some kind of leg pain, whether it be my quadriceps or my knee. We'll see what he says. I don't really expect him to do anything actually. I expect him to tell me (again) to have patience and that this takes time and to continue to push through the pain when I run...and he'll see me in another 3 months. I don't expect him to suggest more HA therapy or anything more invasive, and I can't get a different brace until next year when my insurance will cover it, so really, there's not much to chat about. But I'll go, because at least he encourages me to run.

Keep Going!

I move between acceptance and ambition, even on my runs lately. I'll be trucking along, steady pace going when some random flash of pain will hit my knee or leg. If it stops I keep going, telling myself to try and push through the pain, to keep going, unless it is unbearable. If the pain continues after that initial flash I'll modify how I'm running, usually shortening my stride. So far it's been working. It's a slow process. So this week I've been trying to get back on track after my work trip and week of recovery from said trip. So far I've run a couple of 4 milers/6kms which has not been easy. It's like I pressed reset on my running button to two months ago. My leg swells, the brace can't seem to fit right and running on a swollen ankle (while the opposite leg is just fine) is borderline ridiculous. But I continue on. Because my choice is either continue the fight to regain what I can or just give up. And I certainly didn't give up when I started running, 50+lbs heavier, running in yoga pants in the pre-dawn darkness to avoid onlookers, I didn't give up during my first half marathon, marathon or ultra, although there were points during each that I really, really wanted to and questioned why I was even out there to begin with. Nope. I kept going, kept pushing through all of that and I'll do the same with this too. It's not that I'm a particularly good runner. Actually I'm really slow (even at the best of times) but I enjoy being out there. Moving through the woods, along a trail on a sunny day, there's nothing better. It doesn't matter how slowly I move, just that I still can and I will. All that said I have a new goal! My work is actually paying for employees to run the Navy 10km race in August. Free race you say? Sign me up! It'll be my first race of the year and I'm excited and hopeful to try and run it in under 1:30. This time last year I would have been aiming for less than an hour but things change and this year I'll get to appreciate the course more ;-)

First run back

There's nothing like coming home. Settling into a routine with the ones you love, enjoying simple life pleasures and the comfort in predictability... and the first run back in the neighborhood. Yesterday I geared up and headed for home after my first day back in the office. It was a gorgeous sunny day with a slight breeze. I started off slow (and didn't really get much faster) but relished every familiar step along the way. In the end I stood with my hands on my hips, feeling confident and happy to be back where I belong. On my run I thought about my trip and the things I would miss about Paris (the baguettes, the friendly people, the chocolate!) and the things I wouldn't (the heat, the crowds, the nicotine filled air, the shower curtain-less rooms-wth?!). Then I remembered a conversation I had during the trip that gave me an extra push during my run. I was asked if I had "lost confidence in my body" after my accident. While I'm not sure if the person meant to be hurtful, it certainly came across that way, as if they doubted my ability to overcome adversity. As an ultra runner there are SO many times you momentarily "lose confidence" in what you are doing, but part of my journey with running has taught me that the body is an amazing, adaptable thing and with patience I can persevere through these difficulties. Will I be the same runner? No, but I haven't been the same runner after each injury or lay off. A runner adapts, learns from their mistakes and if that adaptation means running less, with a knee brace or on different surfaces for a while (or forever) then so be it. The point is that I can still get out there and enjoy nature and all the beautiful things running can give me. So what was my response? "No, of course not."

Au Revoir Paris!

Oh mon dieu it is good to be back home! I just spent two weeks taking training in Paris, and yes, it was beautiful and fun but it was also time away from my family that I missed so dearly. Leading up to the trip I was very worried about my swollen knee and how it would react to being at 30+ thousand feet. Needless to say, it throbbed and hurt a lot but I managed to refrain from calling a mid-air emergency both ways. I hobbled off the plane after 11 hours and walked for another 2 trying desperately to find my hotel (it seemed so straight forward on Google back at home!). Once at my hotel I got settled and tried to recover from my first bout of jet lag. All I'll say about that is that jet lag sucks and it took 3 days for me to feel normal again. Somehow I managed to get to work the next day though and stay semi-conscious, with the aide of 3 double espressos. My leg eventually felt better, but then the constant (and I mean constant) walking of over 6km a day (sometimes 16!) left me hobbling back to the hotel day after day looking for an ice pack. I tried my brace, but it chaffed my leg and was insanely hot in the 35 degree weather that is June in Paris. I think if my mother hadn't joined me for the second week I probably would have spent the weekend in my air conditioned room instead of walking for 10 hours each day, but hey, I saw the sights right? Jury's still out on how I feel about that. So no, I didn't join the throngs of runners endlessly running in the beautiful streets of Paris at all hours of the day, but I felt my endless walking was making up for the shorter runs I'd normally be doing. After a day I figured out why Parisians are not overweight (or even seem concerned about their weight). It isn't their diet, although more fatty and heavily laden with carbs, is mostly free of fast food and pre-packaged everything. Their secret is the insane amount of walking they do every day. These people have functional fitness down to an art. Seriously. I saw two people in two weeks who would be considered overweight, and not once did I see an obese person in a wheelchair or huffing and puffing up stairs. The runners I saw ran with such a relaxed pace it could almost be called "jogging" (gasp!). They often stopped for walk breaks and I didn't see one doing anything close to speed work or checking their watch for their splits. And I saw hundreds of runners. I just wished that I could have been one of them, even for a short run.

Stairs!

I can finally walk up stairs again! yay! (Sometimes it's the little things ;-)) I've been taking them slowly, but I don't have to take a "pain-break" between floors and it doesn't sting for minutes afterward any longer! Holy crow this recovery is taking a long time, but at least I'm improving, even if it is by baby steps. I had a good weekend of running while I was away at another dance competition for my daughter and on the way home my husband asked about my plans for the summer, meaning, was I planning to race, and if so where and when so he can plan camping trips around it. It was time to decide. Enough wobbling, hoping and wishful thinking, it was time to chose what exactly (if anything) I'd be doing this summer. I thought back to a conversation I had with a coworker recently, who had told me about her own extensive knee issues and her applauding me for saying I was going to take the year to recoup and get back into racing form for the next year. Did I really mean that? I decided that, yes, I did. So, no formal races for me this summer. Instead I'll be running and training my knee to learn how to endure longer than a 10k run again. I did hold off on cancelling the entire year though. I think I do want to do a half marathon in the fall, something with small hills, no major climbers or big fanfare, just a simple half marathon to prove I can still do it. That, if it goes well, should catapult me into a solid winter season of training for next year's Waskally Wrabbit trail race and the Brookfield trail race in PEI next summer. Yesterday I enjoyed the beautiful weather (+17 and sunny) to take in a short 4.5km run from work. My knee protested for the first half kilometer, so I walked for a few meters, but then was totally pain free for the remainder of the run (^?^). My leg was a bit swollen but doesn't (knocking on wood as I type) to be as much of an issue as it has been on every. single. run. My brace has been giving me some chaffing burns on the back of my knee, where it is open for comfort (ha!), so I've been wearing capris as much as I can to avoid the burns. So far it's working. Today it's raining so I may just work on strength training, something that's become a big part of my recovery. In a week's time I get to go to Paris for work. Anyone who knows me well knows I don't like to fly (although I love planes and know way too much about them) and that I hate to be away from my family. So I'm not exactly looking forward to the trip, although I know it will be amazing (I don't expect any sympathy, I know many people would love to go). I am hoping to get in some running, although with the cobblestone streets I don't think I'll take my VFFs with me. At the moment my biggest issue is figuring out how I can take everything I'll need in a backpack since Paris is known for its endless stairs. Thank goodness I can finally go up them again!

(I may follow this little girl if the stairs get too much! ;-))

A beautiful run in Moncton

Getting ready for a run this weekend I almost forgot my brace. I laughed at myself for the oversight, knowing that I wouldn't have gotten too far without it. Strapped up and ready to go I ventured out onto the foggy streets of Moncton and headed towards Dieppe. The temperature was a chilly 2 degrees when I left but it rose steadily over the next hour. First I ran on the sidewalk, empty and wide on this holiday morning. My legs felt tired and slow, but not in pain. I got to the 1.2km mark and looked at my phone-1.2km! I thought I had (at least!) run 2kms. With a sigh I continued on, looking for a way to get onto the more scenic trail that was on the opposite side of the road. After another half kilometer I found an entrance and watched as the river appeared to my left as the fog lifted. The trail was lovely. Crushed gravel gave way to a wooden boardwalk that paralleled the main street. Then, after a fork in the road, it turned to dirt and continued on for another 2kms, rolling and curving beside tree saplings and small pavilions. After 45 minutes I had to turn around to make it back to my hotel room. I had the path mostly to myself, with the odd couple or cyclist appearing for an early stroll or bike. My knee "reminded" me it was injured a couple of times in the first few kilometers, but after 4kms it settled down and I felt like I had a solid pace going. I could only manage 6kms in total but then I managed to follow it up with another 2kms of walking with my family, so I was really pleased to actually cover a whole 5 miles in a morning again. Maybe next time I will run the whole thing! ;-)